An addictive tale of awakening, soulmates and past lives
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“What the heart has once owned and had, it shall never lose.”– Henry Ward Beecher
Don't know about you, but I've been there: desperately trying to stay afloat in the depths of an emotional abyss. Spinning with no end in sight.
Well first, let me say: if you hold on, if you keep searching: you will emerge. And then slowly, you'll become more, well: You.
Resisting this? Play with me a moment. To do this, imagine a time in your life when you had it all figured out. You're a child, fearless. You think you've met your soulmate. You got that job, or you got into that school.
How much time did you spend on inner questions? Next to none, right? When life is going tickety-boo and there's no discomfort, why go there?
“One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you can't utter.”– James Earl Jones
As a kid, I was The Wonder Child in my family, though I didn't seek to be this. I couldn't help it. Things just came easily to me. Grades, friends, sports. I naturally followed the rules. I met my high school sweetheart easily at 15, and we were best friends for years.
At 16, I was like a settled 45 year old! I just figured life would continue serving me up wonderful bounty, because that's who I was. Looking back, to be honest, I felt smugly superior. I wasn't unkind or cruel. But I did feel special and untouchable, and that “bad stuff” happened to everyone else.
At about 18, restlessness set in. I broke up with my best friend (who was desperately trying to hold on to who I was in the past) and began a pretty superficial few years. At 25, I promptly made choices that resulted in my heart being ripped open. A horrible betrayal, the kind that movies are made of.
“Let your tears come. Let them water your soul.”– Eileen Mayhew
My first real heartbreak at 25, was one of many that would follow.
Over many years I struggled, and then finally, forgave and found peace. Make no mistake: this process took years. Even when I was deep into personal development work, I'd make a choice in good faith, and then I'd find myself knocked to my knees again, revealing a whole new layer.
These heartbreak experience I now call Soul Catalysts. What they did over time, was soften me, move me into my heart. Ground me. Make me more grateful, more humble, more resilient. And they gave me the most generous gift of all: the desire to help others on the same journey: the journey from the Mind to the Heart.
Today, I look back at myself as a young woman who early on lived a charmed life. The truth was that I was terrified of being hurt, and so locked my heart away. I was especially fearful of being let down by other people (which of course I then created) and this spiraling unconscious distrust has coloured all of my relationships.
I love this young woman very much, and feel protective of her. For despite her defiant, shielding strength, I know her true vulnerability.
“The longest journey you'll ever travel, is the one you make from your head to your heart.”– Cynthia Barlow
It's only been recently that I've come to realize fully that my writing, for some, is a bridge between the mind and the heart.
You may not know, I did a degree in biology way back and I have my MBA. I also still do consulting in a very technical industry. Using my mind is a skill I have. Yet I also understand its limitation.
How do you know if your soul wants you make this illuminating journey? You'll know if you feel restless. If what surrounds you no longer make sense. If you feel angry or depressed. If you're resisting life change. If you feel disconnected, misunderstood, alone.
You'll also know if you do anything to clamp down on your heart, to unnaturally stop your natural flow of emotion.
What if your heartbreaks were meant to re-connect you to Source?
To help you connect with your intuition?
To deepen your appreciation for what you have?
To help you re-claim your true power?
To prompt you to go within and ask: Who am I and why am I here?
“Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses.”– Lao Tzu
Here's what I've learned. Your open heart is a conduit which connects you Source Energy, where intuition and soulmates live. Your mind can philosophize, but it won't connect you to Source. Your heart is an energy field, and free flowing heart energy is the key to trusting yourself.
Healing the heart isn't for everyone. Lots of folks go through life, with their hearts closed. Personally, I'd rather not hang out with these folks too long.
While I do choose with whom to spend my time, I understand that it's not mine to judge. I don't know why someone's chosen to close their heart. I don't know their soul agreement and why they're here.
“The expansion of a single being even to God, this is love.”– Victor Hugo
To put a cap on this question, let me say it this way. What do you feel when you're around someone who has a closed heart? Would you call them when you're vulnerable? Do you feel safe with them? Do they feel authentic to you?
What do you feel in the presence of someone who's had their heart broken, and then quietly restores themselves, opening their heart further?
Well, there you go.
The reason there's heartbreak, is that, in some cases, it results in transformation of a soul that is achingly, astonishingly beautiful.