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Soulmates are karmic relationships, but they may or may not be soulmates. Does that makes sense? Let me explain.
Whenever we have a connection to another person, I believe that the connection is karmic. Some are very significant, like parents, children and marriage partners. Others are close, like good friends, but perhaps not central. And others are on the periphery of our lives, though no less important.
The karma we share has brought us together again. What is karma? The question is: what type of karma? Perhaps we have a conflict or obligation to work out. Or perhaps we shared a loving – or even tragic – experience. The question is — since this is the soulmate site! How far is the relationship along what I call the Soulmate Continuum?
The Soulmate Continuum is my scale for measuring relationships... on one end is low vibration karmic relationships full of shame, guilt, conflict, obligation and anger (these often are signaled by intense HERE WE GO AGAIN DREAD) and a feeling that you cannot resist. On the other end, is love and acceptance: soulmates.
Here's a really good definition of karmic relationships, from a book I recommend you read if you're interested in the topic.
Quoted from Discovering your Soul Mission by Linda Brady and Evan St. Lifer
“All the relationships we enter into - including those involving soulmates - are karmic. By initiating a relationship, we set in motion a soul contract with that soul to learn a lesson and resolve an issue from a previous life. A soul mate represents a karmic relationship that we have resolved: a deep conflict that has been settled, an obligation that has been fulfilled, and love that has replaced fear and anger.
We recognize a soulmate by the supreme level of comfort and security we feel with that person. That doesn't mean that there aren't issues that remain to be ironed out. Rather, it means we know intuitively that we can resolve issues with our soul mate without losing his or her love and respect.
When feelings of abandonment and betrayal arise with a soulmate, they do not last. Once soulmates achieve an ultimate level of symbiosis and serenity with each other, it remains forever.”
Isn't this a beautiful way to look at karmic relationships? I also think it's so encouraging!
Think about it: if there really are past lives, then we've probably been around a few times before. We're asking big questions like who is my soulmate... so perhaps we've been here hundreds of times!
What this means is that every karmic relationship we have... has the potential to become a soulmate. Now — potential doesn't mean reality. Not everyone is ready at the same time to tackle the same problems. We've all experienced issues of timing and forgiveness. But when both people are committed to working it out... it can be done.
As a karmic astrologer myself, I hesitate to say that someone is ‘compatible’ or ‘incompatible’ because this assumption takes away choice and personal power. Two charts can indeed have good synastry or compatibility... yet two people who are not ready to work through what they are here to learn, won't stay together. Or... two people with challenging chart synastry may have the ability and willingness to rise to the occasion.
Astrological synastry is a fascinating art and a good indicator of karmic relationships. Astrologers who are good at is have a real skill... but never forget, the end result is up to you and your partner. Whether it's the tone of your long-term relationship, or the nature of your ending, you control whether or not the relationship has moved ‘up’ (so to speak) the Soulmate Continuum, or ‘down’. Here's some good information on soulmate synastry.
What I like about karmic or esoteric astrology, is that not only can we get an idea of compatibility using synastry, but we can also get information on karmic relationships and what each partner is here to heal and stimulate in each other.
Also, through what's called a composite chart (or chart combining two individual charts representing the chart of the relationship itself), you can also get information on the ‘purpose’ of the relationship by looking at the composite North Node. With two willing people, this information can add richness to the experience of life and their experience together and provide a grounding force, even through difficulty.
In Cosmic Love: Secrets of the Astrology of Intimacy Revealed, Jan Spiller says:
“My research has shown that if a couple honors the direction of the composite North Node — by sign and by house — as the goals in their relationship, negative issues tend to ease. You can also maximize the positive flow of energy in your relationship by recognizing and aiming toward — its highest potential.
Why bother look this deep? Because when conflicts arise in a karmic relationship (even a soulmated one), this is a powerful way to shift perspectives on the situation, and look at it a new way. When you do this, how we feel about it changes, too. And then we make different decisions: ones that draw us closer to our soulmate.
Karma isn't a punishing force. It's a balancing force. What is karma? Here's an example. I had a client who fell in love while attending college. She was completely besotted with a young man...and he broke her heart. Left her, with little explanation. Theirs was a karmic relationship, with karma to work out, though she didn't see it this way for many years.
Years later... the got in touch and wanted her back. He appeared sincere. She was confused, angry and scared: he had hurt her deeply. She wasn't sure if she should trust him. Her chart showed that in a past life reincarnation story, she had been commitment phobic, and she had left him without explanation. To balance their karma, she needed to experience what that was like: and then forgive him. Shifting her perspective helped her to forgive him, and slowly explore where they were. Today, they are married with two beautiful children.
A fantastic book on the complexities of karmic relationships is Edgar Cayce on Soulmates by Kevin J. Todeschi.
Not every karma story is so crystal clear. Most have many layers and they may even take a while to figure out. I know mine did. However, staying open to this idea that all of our relationships are karmic holds incredible richness... if we choose to look at it that way.
And every step we take ‘up’ the Soulmate Continuum, is not only good for our karma, it's good love advice, too.
Karmic astrology – How karmic astrology can help you attract your soulmate
Past life regression therapists — An 11 point checklist on how to choose one, how to keep yourself safe, my personal experience and more...